Title: A Broken Fairytale

Summary: Post NFA  They were like a fairytale, albeit a broken one B/A

Rating: PG

A/N: Written for Rachel for the Angelficathon. Requests/Restrictions at the end.

 

 

 

He was surprised that Xander was the one to stay.  There had been so many others here, slayers, witches, watchers and he was fairly sure that in the middle of battle he’d caught a glimpse of golden hair, grace and death combined in the lithe form of a girl. She hadn’t gotten close enough to be sure and she was gone before he regained consciousness.

 

He was also surprised that it was Xander delivered his blood, even more surprised when he set it down on the night stand, flipped on the lamp and then settled in the chair next to his bed. The amber light cut through the dim quiet of his suite.

 

“Gunn mentioned that you weren’t eating.”

 

Angel cocked an eyebrow at him and propped himself up in the bed. The dulled red comforter slid across a burn, making him wince with pain.  “You care why? And shouldn’t Gunn be doing some healing of his own?”

 

“Don’t mistake this for actual concern, Deadboy. I promised someone we both love more than ourselves that I’d make sure you were okay,” Xander smirked. He leaned back in the dark brown leather armchair and crossed his legs, one ankle on his knee.

 

Angel nodded. So she was at the heart of this. She was the only one he could think of that could hold Xander to a promise to stay here. “You don’t have to.”

 

“Yes I do. She’s not the kind of girl you break promises too. At least one of us in this room doesn’t,” Xander snapped. “Now drink your blood. She’s expecting you to recover completely and right now, Deadboy…you aren’t looking like you’re usual brooding, tall, dark and attractive self.”

 

“I can do without hearing you call me attractive ever again,” Angel snarked.

 

Xander smirked. “Believe me. So can I.” He put his hands behind his head and studiously avoided watching Angel eat.

 

Angel took his blood and sipped at it. He wanted to ask if she was coming back, if she’d ever been there. Sometimes when he slept he was convinced she was something like a mirage, a hallucination he’d made up because he needed her to be there. He sipped his blood in silence.

 

Xander remained quiet while Angel drank his blood. If Angel had been anything but a vampire, he wouldn’t have withstood the injuries he’d suffered. There were large patches of burned flesh all over his body. Great bone deep gouges scored the rest of his body from where the dragon had scrabbled with him in the middle of its dying throes.         

 

Xander waited until Angel had drained the mug then picked it up and walked out of the room. He closed the door, encasing Angel in his own, private cocoon again.

 

*

 

Willow was the next one to show up. She came bearing ID, credit cards with “spiffy credit” and the number for a Swiss bank account. Angel was feeling up to sitting in the lobby most days now and that was where she found him.

 

He held up the dark blue bank account book. “What’s this?”

 

Willow grinned and sat down on the couch beside him. Confidence and power radiated from her. The little bookworm from Sunnydale had finally come into her own.  “Let’s just say that Wolfram and Hart had their assets liquidated before you took them down.”

 

He paused a moment, trying to decide if he felt guilty about taking an untold amount of money from Wolfram and Hart. He only had to consider how he’d lost Fred, Cordy, and Wes, what they’d done to his son, to him. They’d brought Spike back to haunt him. It didn’t take much for him to decide that he didn’t feel guilty in the least.

 

“Things seem to be going well here. Xander says he’s getting the Hyperion back up to snuff. He’s even got plans to open up the wing with the pool in it,” Willow mentioned.

 

“Really?” Angel asked surprised.

 

Willow wrinkled her nose. “He hasn’t said anything to you about it?”

 

Angel chuckled. “It’s Xander. We only talk when absolutely necessary. Most of the time I think he wishes I had died in that battle and I’m not sure why he’s still here.  Not that his help isn’t appreciated.”

 

Willow nodded.  “Okay, well, I thought Giles was going to call you, but I guess he got busy with everything.”

 

Or he still thinks I’m evil. Angel quickly dismissed the thought. It wasn’t something he needed to dwell on. He brought his attention back to Willow’s words.

 

“Anyway, we thought maybe if it was alright with you, we could use the Hyperion for a way station of sorts for some for some of the slayers. Actually, eventually Giles wants an American branch of the Watcher’s Council, kind of a slayer school more than anything. Not that we’d ever presume to establish it in the Hyperion.”

 

“No, I actually wouldn’t mind. If Xander gets the place fixed up, you could have an entire wing from the rest of the place. It’s certainly big enough and so much of the space is wasted.” Angel paused. He fidgeted with his hands and cleared his throat. “So…who’s going to be running the slayer school?”

 

A barely contained grin teased Willow’s lips. “We haven’t quite decided just yet, but Giles and I are tossing around some ideas. We’ve got a couple of good candidates.” She glanced down at her watch. “I’ve got to go. My plane leaves in a couple of hours.” She bounced to her feet, hugged Angel impulsively and started toward the door.

 

Her visit was only temporary. She was busy helping Giles develop a Wiccan branch of the Watcher’s Council.  She stopped half way to the front door and turned back to Angel. “Oh! I almost forgot, cookie dough status: Gooey but not quite done.”

 

Angel gave Willow a confused look which caused the redhead to laugh as she walked out the door.

 

Angel was still sitting on the couch with that puzzled look on his face when Gunn walked in.  “Angel, man you look confused. Something wrong?”

 

Angel looked up at him, his brow furrowed. “What stage of baking are cookies gooey but not quite done?”

 

Gunn chuckled.  “You planning on opening up a bakery?”

 

“It’s…” Angel paused. It wasn’t as if the whole thing made any sense. “Nothing. I was just…thinking about cookies.”

 

Gunn cocked an eyebrow at Angel and then nodded.

 

A few days later Gunn yelled at Angel from the kitchen.  Angel put aside the book he was reading and wandered into the kitchen, the smell of chocolate chip cookies enveloping him. Gunn was wearing red oven mitts.

 

“You bake cookies?” Angel asked dubiously.

 

Gunn shrugged. “I was raised by my grandma. She liked to bake cookies, when she got older she needed help.”  He jerked open the oven door and pointed with a red mitted hand. “That’s gooey.”

 

Angel peered at the cookies. “They look done to me.”

 

“Just around the edges. The center is still a gooey mess. You try to get it off the pan and it’ll fall apart on you,” Gunn explained.

 

“So you leave it on the pan and let it bake a little longer?” Angel asked.

 

“Less you want a mess of cookie, yup.”

 

Angel sighed. He definitely did not want a mess of cookie.

 

*

 

Connor stopped by next. He’d been calling every few days to check on Angel, but he hadn’t been by to see him yet. He didn’t come to stay. He had things like college and an internship to get back to. His hair was longer and Angel wanted to chide him to get a haircut, but he held his tongue. Other than that, Connor looked good, relatively happy and well adjusted.

 

He stood in the lobby staring at his father, his hands stuffed deep in his pockets. There were still healing bits of new, pink skin all over Angel’s body and face.

 

“I know I look awful,” Angel offered, “but I am feeling better than I look.”

 

Connor shook his head. “You don’t look that bad.” He paused, starring down at his black converse sneakers. “You didn’t expect to make it out of the battle.”

 

Angel took a deep unnecessary breath. “No,” he said quietly.

 

Connor nodded. “Glad you did.”

 

They both shifted their feet awkwardly and let the silence widen the space between them.  “That application you filled out for me…I got the internship. They mentioned I had nice penmanship,” Connor smirked.

 

Angel chuckled. “We had a tutor when I was a child. I got my knuckles rapped many, many times with a ruler before my penmanship passed her standards.”

 

Connor nodded.  “Yeah, they don’t stress that much these days. At least I don’t think they do. Thanks for not having Wolfram and Hart include ruler rapping as a memory. But the thing where I like ballet? Pretty sure you had them plant that and I will get you back for that one of these days.”

 

Angel grinned. “I tried to get them to give you full knowledge of every song Barry Manilow ever made. They said it was cruel and unusual punishment and refused to do it.”

 

Connor laughed. “Points for Hell Incorporated.”

 

The stiff silence returned sweeping away the moment of familiarity they’d shared. Connor cleared his throat. “So, I’m gonna go. I just wanted to stop by and see how you were doing.”

 

“You don’t have to,” Angel said stepping toward Connor. “We could-Gunn has movies here. I could order pizza. I’m sure everyone here is hungry.”

 

“No, I kind of do. I have to be at work in a half hour. It’ll take nearly that to get across town,” Connor explained.

 

Angel nodded. Connor had stopped by knowing he wouldn’t have much time, making sure he had an out. Angel reminded himself that they hadn’t done this damage overnight. It wouldn’t be repaired in that space of time either.  “Okay. You can stop by anytime. There’s almost always someone here.”

 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he started for the front door and paused. “Talk to you later, Dad.”

 

It was the “Dad” that sent him to his room to brood for hours. Everyone heard the sobs coming from the vampire’s suite and came up with reasons not to disturb him.

 

 

*

 

 

“That was at least a three pointer,” Angel argued. Two months ago Xander and Gunn had put up a basketball goal. Connor had taken to stopping by on a regular basis and they’d formed a weekly game-- Xander and Connor against Gunn and Angel.

 

“It was not. The Azalea bushes mark the three point line. You were at least a foot from them.” Xander gestured wildly to the bushes in question as he spoke.

 

Angel looked to Connor for help who just smirked. “I’m on his team.” He pointed to Xander.

 

Angel grumbled. “Fine. I still think it was three points but we’ll settle for two points.” He bounced the ball once and passed it to Connor.

 

“So… what’s the score?” A new, feminine voice asked.

 

Gunn, Connor and Xander turned toward the voice. Angel went still. After what seemed like forever he turned and felt like he’d been hit in the gut with a sledgehammer. Buffy leaned against the door leading into the courtyard.  The moonlight overhead seemed to focus on her with the same intensity the men in the courtyard were doing.

 

“Buffster, wondering when you were going to get here,” Xander finally said.

 

Buffy smiled and shrugged. “I took the scenic route.”  She directed her response to Xander but her eyes never left Angel.

 

“Since cave man here is too stunned to talk, I’m Connor. You’d think he’d never seen a pretty girl before.”  Connor shot a smirk at Angel and stuck his hand out to shake Buffy’s.

 

She only faltered a moment before she shook his hand. She’d known about this for months.  Giles had told her about Connor, to prepare her. He knew eventually she’d end up in LA.  “I’m Buffy.”

 

 

“Ooooo hooo hooo,” Gunn whistled. “So you’re her.”

 

Connor looked back at Gunn like he had lost his mind. Buffy ducked her head, flushing pink.

 

“Her?” Connor asked.

 

Gunn palmed the basketball and stepped closer. His eyes raked over Buffy. “The love of his life. The girl he spent 3 months mourning in a monastery. We couldn’t say your name around here for months.”

 

Buffy took a deep breath and wrapped her arms around herself. “I guess that would be me.” She glanced up, her eyes finding Angel. “I didn’t know you went to a monastery.”

 

Angel shrugged. “It was infested with demons.”

 

“Oh. Well…isn’t everything these days,” Buffy remarked.

 

Gunn looked back and forth between Buffy and Angel. “Hey, Conn, let’s go order a pizza and break out the play station.”

 

Connor snorted. “Are you kidding? Do you see how uncomfortable he is? This is better than Fear Friday at college. Where’s the popcorn?”

 

Buffy glanced away from Angel long enough to smirk at Connor. “God you really are his son, aren’t you?”

 

“Afraid I’ll beat you in Tekkan?” Gunn taunted.

 

“No way,” Connor shot back. “I will so own you.”

 

“Big words for a little man,” Gunn grinned.

 

Connor rolled his eyes. “You think I don’t know what you’re doing. I know exactly what you’re doing, but I will rise to the bait just because beating your ass is more fun than watching Angel be uncomfortable. Nice to meet you, Buffy.” He commented as he left the courtyard, Gunn trailing behind him. They were still arguing about who would win. Xander quickly followed them, not wanting to be witness to yet another Buffy and Angel Hallmark moment.

 

“So…alone at last,” Angel broke the silence Gunn and Connor had left behind.

 

“Yup.” Buffy scuffed the toe of her shoe across the courtyard paving stones. She sighed and shoved her fingers through her hair. “I’m sorry. I should go.”

 

Angel darted from his spot in the courtyard, closing his fingers around her wrist. “Don’t.”

 

She closed her eyes, her entire body thrumming from his touch. She opened her eyes and looked at his hand on her wrist. His skin was moonlight pale next to her golden tan.  She pulled away from him after a moment.

 

“I don’t know how I thought this was supposed to go…It’s not like I had anything planned. I just…we can’t go back can we?”

 

“I don’t want to go back, Buffy.” Angel started to pace the courtyard. “We made too many mistakes then. I hurt you too many times. Back isn’t an option…” he paused to look at her. “But forward might be.”

 

“Forward to what?” Buffy asked. She spread her arms wide in a gesture. “Forward to losing your soul again? Forward to you’re still a vampire? Forward to can’t take you into the light?”

 

Angel took a deep breath. His fingers went to his temple, rubbing away a headache he didn’t yet have. “So much has happened…so many things to break my soul…I don’t think I can loose it anymore.”

 

Buffy narrowed her eyes. “What do you mean?” This was Angel and his soul. She wanted it spelled out.

 

Angel sighed. “I don’t know if there is such a thing as perfect happiness for me.”

 

“Oh.” It was a quiet sound of disappointment and regret. “It’s okay…I used to lie in bed at night and wish you didn’t love me so much. I’m just not used to wishes coming true.”

 

Angel grabbed her by the arms and pulled her closer to him. His eyes were lit with an intensity that he hadn’t felt since taking on the Senior Partners. Buffy did this to him, her mere presence made him alive. “It has nothing to do with loving you. I didn’t even know it was possible to love you more now than I did then, but I know the things you’ve overcome, the battles you’ve won and I can’t help but love you more than I did.” He released her slowly, letting her go inch by inch as he spoke.

 

Her eyes filled with tears and her voice came out thick and choked. “Then what? What happened that can destroy any chance of happiness for you?”

 

“My son was kidnapped by one of my friends and raised in a hell dimension. Most days I think he still wants to kill me. I’ve lost more friends than I’ve saved. I’m living with Xander.” The chuckle that erupted from him was almost hysterical. He met Buffy’s eyes; the chuckle was cut off abruptly. “And last but never least, making love to the girl I adore turns me into an evil, murdering psychopath.”

 

Buffy rubbed her eyes and sighed. “Yeah…I can see how that would do it. But you just stated the reason why I have to go. Murdering psychopath…and I know you can still lose your soul. Willow told me she had to come put it back last year.”

 

“It was taken with magic. Yes the shaman gave me what he thought was a perfect day, but it only loosened the hold on my soul enough that he could wretch it away from me. It wouldn’t have left on its own…not like last time,” Angel explained.

 

Buffy spent several moments absorbing that. “So what? That doesn’t take away all our problems, Angel. We’re bigger than sex and wow that sounds so wrong, but even though that last year in Sunnydale was all about not having sex...it was about everything else. We’re more than that.”

 

“If you’re going to use the word sex could you say it quieter next time?” Connor yelled from the lobby. “Those of us with super hearing would prefer not to hear about their father having sex.”

 

Buffy couldn’t help but laugh. Angel just shook his head and scratched his temple. “Sorry…that’s my son for you.”

 

Buffy smiled. “It’s not as if things were tension-y and needed to be broken.”

 

Angel shrugged. “There is that.”

 

Buffy sat down on the steps. Angel joined her after a moment. She buried her head in her hands and he chanced reaching out to place his hand on her back. She was too thin. He could feel every vertebra in her spine.

 

“And it’s back to the tension,” she whispered and turned her head, resting her cheek in her palm so she could look at him. “Seriously…problems abound.”

 

“And they’ll always abound. No relationship is without problems, Buffy.” He took a deep breath. The air was filled with the scent of night blooming jasmine.  The sounds of Gunn and Connor’s Tekkan match filtered out into the courtyard. “I used to have this idealized version of what a relationship was like. It was everything I couldn’t give you and more. It was utterly perfect. No fights, no problems, no vampires and no demons. It was as sublime in my mind as you were.”

 

He paused again and glanced over at her before returning his eyes to the paving stones below his feet. “And then I came to LA. I guess you could say I grew up. I found out there’s no such thing as perfect. Relationships have problems and goddess’ have flaws and it doesn’t make us love them any less.”

 

The tears that had been threatening Buffy won their battle spilling over her lashes and onto her cheeks, leaving pale, glistening streaks on her skin. She sniffed and wiped them away with the back of her hand. “So where does that leave us?”

 

“Where do you want it to leave us?” Angel’s voice trembled and he silently cursed himself for allowing that much emotion into such a simple phrase.

 

Buffy took a deep breath and held it for almost a full minute before releasing it. She glanced over at Angel. There was so much riding on her answer. “Things have changed. I’m not the girl I was when you lived in Sunnydale. Losing you changed me, losing Mom, even Riley leaving…then there was that whole dying thing along with the coming back from Heaven thing…And Spike…through it all there was two constants. The sun always rose…and I always love you.”

 

She wasn’t sure if Angel pulled her toward him or she just naturally gravitated closer, but his arm was around her, his fingers were tangled in her hair. He wiped away a tear with his thumb and then dipped his head to kiss the tracks they had left. She tilted her face up and his lips brushed hers.  They’d never had any other option. They were like a fairytale, albeit a broken one, it had to end with the princess and the prince riding off into the sunset.

 

And they lived happily ever after…

 

 

Requests/Restrictions:

 

Pairing (or none) you want to read: Buffy/Angel
Up to two other characters you want included: Wes, Willow (but if you
want to do just B/A it's cool)
Rating preference: Any
Requests (1 or 2): Set S5 or Post- NFA (if you do S5, set around
Damage would be nice, but not necessary). Happy ending
Restrictions (1 or 2): No non-BA pairings, especially Nina (unless
she's getting dumped.)