Title: Her Gift

Summary: Buffy’s pov after Graduation and her thoughts on the bite. Angst

Written for 15 minute ficlets. The word was giving.

 

 

 

 

            The sky wept with her and she was glad not to be the only one crying. Her hand strayed to the bandage on her neck. She pulled it off gently, fingertips brushing the puncture wounds there. She closed her eyes, tossing out a line and trying to *feel* him. There was nothing, no tingle, no skipping heartbeat, no catching breath. He was gone and that is why the sky and the girl wept.

 

            She had so little to cherish of him, a cross, a jacket, a ring, a book of poetry and now these puncture wounds being his latest gift, a product of her final gift to him, her life. She hadn’t died though and she wondered if that cheapened her gift. It didn’t matter, it wasn’t as if she had anything else to give him. She’d given her heart and soul long ago, maybe even before she was born. She’d given her body, her mind and her future. He possessed all of her and he’d taken it when he disappeared into the mist. Empty rooms with a shattered soul rattling around in them, she thought. She was hollowed out now, no soul, no heart, no mind, no future, no Buffy.

 

            Gnawed off fingernails picked at the scabs, forcing the wounds open and letting them bleed, bringing a fresh, tiny pain. It didn’t distract from the real pain, the pain of his leaving, but it swept her back, swept her back to *that* moment. She had felt her life draining away, rushing into him and giving him his life back. It had been the most incredible experience in her existence. Saving the world didn’t even come close to comparing to saving Angel. She’d saved him, in every way a person can be saved, but more importantly she’d insured that he would live on, even if she didn’t. She could deal with her death. She’d dealt with it long ago. She was ashamed to admit that she could deal with the fact that all her friends and probably most of Sunnydale would have died if he’d taken her life. She didn’t care. He would live. His death was the one thing her slayer powers couldn’t prepare her for. He was immortal, eternal and as long as he lived, the biggest part of her lived too.

 

         So she had given her life to him and his demon had sucked it greedily down. His soul had returned the gift. Maybe he couldn’t deal with her death either. He didn’t realize leaving had killed her anyway.